36 Short Lessons After 36 Long Years of Life

Tomorrow, I turn 36.

It’s been a wild ride. When I look back at the last three decades of my life, I’m proud of the person I’ve become. Like everyone else, I’ve made mistakes and experienced failures. But, with mistakes and failures come lessons, and life provides many lessons if we’re open to receiving them. My life's lessons have served me well: I am in a happy relationship, I have a career that makes the world a better place, and I am content with who I am.

To celebrate another revolution around Sol, I feel it’s appropriate to share the lessons I’ve learned with you, dear reader, hoping that one (or more) of them resonate with you. It is also appropriate to list 36 lessons in no particular order. Keep in mind that these are lessons that I’ve learned through my own unique life experiences. You may have a different view, and that’s fine. Diversity is the beauty of life.

• As Socrates said: "Know Thyself". Seriously. If you don’t know who you are, at the deepest level, you’ll navigate this world blind and reactive. Do shadow work and get comfortable exposing parts of yourself that you’ve kept hidden.
• Don’t get so caught up in the busyness of life that you forget what’s important to you.
• The greatest gift you can give someone is your full attention.
• Never underestimate the power of accretion. Start where you are and take small steps towards your goals every day. Those small steps will add up over time.
• Aim for progress, not perfection. The latter is a fantasy. The former will transform your life.
• Remember that you will die, so don't waste a single moment. Live your truth.
• Cherish your loved ones. They won’t always be around.
• Exercise and strengthen your body. It’s the vessel through which you navigate this life.
• You’re made up of about 60% water, so stay hydrated.
• Focus on what’s in your control, and don't worry about the rest. Do this, and your life will be instantly and significantly better.
• See reality for what it is.
• Don’t be apathetic. The world needs more people who care and leave it a better place than they found.
• Be nice to people. You don’t know what they are dealing with or what they’ve had to overcome.
• Listen a lot more than you speak. As Epictetus said, you have two ears and one mouth for a reason.
• Don’t take yourself too seriously. Life’s no fun that way.
• Say no — a lot. Your time is limited and precious. Be sure that what you say yes to is what you really want to do.
• Learning enhances your potential, so fall in love with learning. Knowledge compounds. The broader your intellectual reach, the better decisions you'll make.
• Don’t waste your precious mental energy trying to remember everything. Unless you were born with an eidetic memory (spoiler alert: most of us aren’t), you’re going to forget a lot of things. So, write everything down.
• Eat more plant-based food. A plant-based diet is scientifically proven to be the healthiest diet across the board and is great for the planet too. Win-win.
• Difficult times come and go. Happy times come and go. Learn from and appreciate them, but don’t hold on to or wish them away. They all form part of the cycle of life.
• Amor fati. You have no control over most of what happens to and around you. Focus on what you can control and enjoy the ride, no matter where it takes you.
• Embrace stillness. We get bombarded with hit after hit of stimulation daily, whether from social media, work, or the news. Take a step back from all the noise. Be still for a moment. There is magic in silence.
• You can do anything, but you can’t do everything. Decide where to focus your time and energy, then get to work.
• Don’t compare yourself to others. Your journey is unique. All that matters is whether you are better today than yesterday.
• Communicate clearly. People will interpret what you say through the lens of their own life experiences, so leave no room for ambiguity.
• Keep your ego in check. If left unfettered, it will destroy you.
• You don’t need another Thing. Over-consumption is a considerable problem and leads to unnecessary environmental waste and mental clutter. Go for a weekend away with that money instead.
• Maintain a growth mindset. Humans have an uncanny ability to learn and grow in all situations unless we shut ourselves off from learning through a fixed mindset. Always be open to new ideas.
• Your time is precious. You will never get it back. So be deliberate about who and what gets your time and attention.
• Trust your intuition. It’s rarely wrong.
• Always plan for things to take much longer than you expect.
• Spend more time in nature.
• Don’t go more than two days without a workout. It’s easy to fall into a spiral of unhealthy living.
• Successful people are no different than you. They get imposter syndrome. They make mistakes. If they can achieve relative success in their lives, so can you.
• Everything in moderation.
• Don’t waste the lessons that life gives you. As Maya Angelou said: “Do the best you can until you know better. When you know better, do better.”

I hope some of my lessons have inspired you, dear reader, to be better tomorrow than you are today.

Until next week,

Ric.